• Storying Youth Work

  The Anti-Hero!

  Posted by Gary A on September 14, 2025 at 12:01 am

  The Anti-Hero’s Intervention

  The air on the Finch West bus was thick with the humid promise of a Toronto summer evening in 2006. Our anti-hero stood near the rear exit, his gaze soft but steady as he watched a group of teenagers board at Jane Street. They moved as one organism, loud, kinetic, a jumble of nervous energy and bravado. One of them, a lanky kid who couldn’t have been more than sixteen, bumped hard into an older man, knocking the man’s newspaper to the floor. “Watch it,” the man grumbled, glaring. The kid squared his shoulders, his friends snickering behind him. “You got a problem?”

  The tension coiled instantly. It was a scene our anti-hero had witnessed a dozen times, a trivial slight ready to ignite into something much worse. This was the precipice, the exact moment where a single, egoic choice could alter a life’s trajectory. Before the man could retort, our anti-hero stepped forward, his presence calm and unassuming. He bent down, picked up the newspaper, and handed it to the man with a nod. Then he turned to the teenager. He didn’t lecture or challenge. He just met his eyes. “Tough day?” he asked, his voice low and even. The kid was thrown off. The script in his head didn’t have a line for this. “What’s it to you?” he mumbled, the aggression draining from his posture, replaced by a flicker of confusion. “Just that you look like you’re carrying a lot,” our anti-hero said, holding his gaze for a second longer. “I get it.” He offered a small, almost imperceptible nod, then moved away, giving them space. The moment was over. The conflict was defused. It wasn’t magic; it was a methodology. For our anti-hero, peace had never been a passive wish. It was an active, teachable skill, and its foundation was the simple, profound act of seeing the person in front of him.

  Our anti-hero’s own story was forged in the crucible of otherness, and unbeknownst to him, this engagement was a precursor to his future work with a youth gang exit project not far from where this all took place. He’d grown up in a different city, one where the chasm between small town and big city tipping points was always a whisper’s echo away. He’d seen friends treated as problems to be solved rather than as people with potential. His own path could have easily mirrored theirs, but a series of almost supernatural interventions, combined with athletics, music, and the kindness of pale-skinned mentors, had changed everything. That experience became the cornerstone of his work, crystallizing into core principles that drove his not-for-profit leaders, Tao; the hunger for respect was a primary human driver, while power imbalances are inevitable, abuse of power and accepting powerlessness are choices, and finally influence and power is not for personal gain, but to empower communities and the people who call their community home.

  When the time came for him to work in the field, he was denied. But not long after, he was given his chance with an employment opportunity. He took the opportunity and lived in his car until his first pay, showering at a nearby community center during morning swim, then moving into a hotel/motel when he could afford it, and moving between motels and sleeping curled up in a driver’s seat tucked away in a plaza or side street for months until he could afford a place to live. But remember, being powerless can be a choice to some. He was lucky to be one of the ‘some,’ so he was not powerless, he was alchemy to power he would later use to inspire a mother who couldn’t pay rent, the participant who needed groceries, or the young man who needed emergency dental work. Our anti-hero never forgot those struggles, and knew for some people what he had the privilege of calling struggle was their harsh reality, and it was during these cold winter nights, his heart was forged to be present until a young person was an older person and let him know “thank you, but I got it from here.”

  • This discussion was modified 3 hours, 56 minutes ago by  Gary A Newman.
  • This discussion was modified 3 hours, 55 minutes ago by  Gary A Newman.

  Gary A replied 3 hours, 58 minutes ago 1 Member · 0 Replies
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